SOCIAL MEDIA & THE CONCEPT OF ONLINE SAFE SPACES
“Therapists are really one of the coolest people I have met..... There really should be no stigma surrounding therapy and the people who go for therapy.”
The concept of therapy in Nigeria is very much debatable. You see, there are people who believe therapy is actually a fucked up concept and that people who do therapy are aliens. Tell an average Nigerian that you are going for therapy and watch them start to avoid you.
Just last week, or maybe a few weeks ago, a shit ton of Nigerians were sharing their stories in the hands of Nigerian therapists on twitter, and it solidifies the beliefs of people in the category above.
Okay, maybe before we delve further, I should tell you that twitter is not a real place. There are many things wrong with that platform and a good number of people who uses it. But heyy, this is supposed to be a safe space too, so let us not bash twitter or those who actively lives on it.
This newsletter is supposed to talk about therapy in Nigeria; the concept of safe spaces and social media. It is pretty much hard to verify the truthfulness in the things people say on (twitter) social media. It is why I hold inflammatory opinions and posts on twitter less than I hold a pinch of salt. People tend to say things that will garner them reactions irrespective of the veracity. So maybe this is that time you consider not letting social media dictate your real life.
But can we do without the virtual world of social media? Maybe we can’t, maybe nobody here is interested in going back to 1830 or the days of the early men. So we are stuck with these platforms now and maybe forever. And that brings us to the topic of today’s health piece: “Social media and the concept of online safe spaces”.
A few months ago – actually, this is before ASUU strike and for those who do not know, this strike started almost six months ago – a friend sent me a link to join an online therapy WhatsApp group.
First, God forbid that I take public online therapy serious. I mean, I’d literally rather die than tell my life’s problems to a group of faceless people. Secondly, the concept of therapy, or should I say that the idea behind therapy is for it to be an exclusive, safe space, and pro-healing. This particular group did not meet any of the checklist. I already saw a few WhatsApp TV owners in the group, which means in broad daylight, my stories will start to trend on their statuses whilst their audience feeds on it.
Taja teran, as in both dogs and goats can join the group as long as they have an internet-connected phone and the link. What if my mother sees the link and join? Do you want her reading it on a public therapy group that her son is doing interstate whocup and can’t commit to relationships? I swear there is no way that group can be pro-healing when people like Bisola, Sodiq, and Boda Nuru are there.
Loro kan, I did not join the group. I even told the person that sent me the group link not to join or be very skeptical of the people she’d meet there. Last week, this friend of mine messaged me that the group is fucked and they’ve shut it down. Verily, verily, as I say unto thee: many people did not join the group because they needed therapy – actually, everybody in Nigeria needs therapy – most people joined just to compare other people’s problems to theirs and hook up with fellow human being of the same or different genitalia.
The thing amused me. Like, why would you join a supposed therapy group just to be shagging other people after getting into their DMs? The supposed random genital meet and greet became messy and when they all finally, spontaneously brought their dirty panties out on the group, rogbodiyan started. Even admins were not spared. They had to do subuhana robika, and ended the group chat.
Nigeria is actually a disturbed country. By the virtual right of just existing in this country, everybody here is haunted. We all deserves to be taken care of because what in God’s beautiful names are the things going on in this place? We are all petrified, hanging on to the last thread of good things in our lives, and open to escapism as our coping mechanism.
If you’re not in Nigeria and you are reading this, please understand that the psyche of an average Nigeria is weird, and because of that, please be gentle with us, except the ones that come to you online as a “Nigerian Prince who wants to share his wealth with you but first needs you to facilitate the arrangement by sending him money”.
Social media is here and I don’t think they are going anywhere soon. Every day, we create new relationships off social media. We interact, engage, and read all sort of things online. Maybe online therapy can work; maybe it is already working. However, you have to be really careful about online therapy groups and the people you virtually make yourself vulnerable too.
Therapy is a wonderful thing. It is more than just talking about your problems to a stranger or shrink. There is evolved human connection, understanding problems, and genuine interest in helping people become well in therapy. If you ask me, I’ll repeat again and again that therapy works.
Therapists are really one of the coolest people I have met. Psychology and psychiatry are wonderful fields interested in championing human development and growth, we really can’t do without the people in these places. There really should be no stigma surrounding therapy and the people who go for therapy.
I just read this piece, and I'm wondering, why on earth and in heaven too, would a person join an online therapy group? Ment?
Not everybody can be a therapist. Folks are certified to actually understand and talk to you. Your mind is too complex for Rafiu with his D7 in Social Sciences/Civic Edu to Understand.
People go to school, and go through programs to become therapists and counsellors. Seek them out. T for Tenks.
Thanks for keeping me informed always. This is so sad and true. This is the true state of things which is very unhealthy.
It's painful to see the problems people are battling being turned into topics of discussion or memes. This in turn saddens those persons involved and they might retreat into their shells. Seeing all that is happening in the online space.
These things are all so shitty and I do not advise anyone to resort to such online platforms.
Plus, some people go for therapy sessions and come back worse... Argh! Painful stuff.
I hope these things are corrected someday soon and people can boldly sign up for therapy sessions.